Its not The Running of The Bulls...but The Running of Rats

Written by misha marinsky

NEW YORK – At a press conference held here at the Javits Convention Center, New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg announced that New York City was inaugurating an annual Running of the Rats, to compete for tourist dollars with Pamplona, Spain and Mina, Saudi Arabia.

“Then,” Mr. Bloomberg went on to say, “once a horde of rats has gathered, and everyone is running and screaming down Broadway, city officials will release a pack of Jack Russell terriers. Pamplona and Mina will pale in comparison. The scene will be a pure, un-distilled New York City Rat Race. We will get immediate world wide attention.”

Mr. Bloomberg said he hoped this event will quickly take on the stature of Pamplona and the reverence of the hajj trampling in Mina. “I do not know if a latter day Hemingway will write about it with such eloquence, but I believe our hope for world class journalists to come here and publicize it, will be realized. We are going to offer complementary airfare and lodging to journalists who will not only write about it, but also participate in it as Hemingway would have.”

...only in America